Lebayy

Tick tick tick

The time is ticking

Bring me closer to the end

Tick tick tick

The time is ticking

Make me even more to pretend

Tick tick tick

The time is ticking

Hope that everything will remained

Cant imagine how to stop this

How to make this heart believe it

That it must be stopped

It must be ended

At the day we meet again

The day that i can finally see u

The day u feel so real

Cause i can touch u

Smell your scent

Hug you deeply in me

Absorbing the last remnants trace of your presence

The day that i can finally let go of my longing to you

It must be ended,

How ironic..

Hope I can stop the time

No.. I wish I can control it!

So I make everyday is a day that u can meet me

I will repeat it over and over again

Until it wont work any longer

:) hmm.. it's sounds nice

(Aaah.. just remained me more about you, bout a dream to kidnapped Doraemon in the cross road at 11 pm >.< )

Maybe I will just let that happened

See the final crush

Of my hope..

And then just Cry..

(lebaaayy)

Hubbub

I try to saved my self with make my heart numb.

It is worked somehow..

But still.. It feels sore .. It feels hollow.

You are there, but I can't reach it.
You are real, but unless in a dream, you are no where to be found.

I want you to want me, so I know it is not a one sided feeling.
But in the same time I know that I can't give you the rest of me.

I am cruel, yes I know that. I am keeping on asking you for my self but at the time I know you will waste.

I am selfish? It's been a clear fact. I better see you weak so I can be the one who giving a strength, because if it is not like that.. then it's mean I'll be the one who take a weak part and crush in pain.

I am sorry...
I am sorry for you
I am sorry for us
I am sorry to make this hard,
To not choose what we really want and to not found u at the right time..

(apaaa yaa ini... >,<)

At a Time When Love Should Go

Can not think too far at this time ..
I can not see it..
The future..

I have taken the decision
I'll follow wherever destiny will take me
But still, my hope will not die until the time,
Because I had already believed it

In while, I would still carve each memory, I maintain every dream..
Above you, yourself, your being, your smell, your face, your warm, your smile, your twinkle eyes, your heart...
For me..
In me..

Cause that all have shaped me, has become an inseparable part of me
When we are one


{I fell in love = in the alpha waves = infinite inspiration}
{means.. too poetic, I hate it sometimes >.<}

Thankfully Wishes

Dear Allah,
Thank You..

I'm happy now..
I'm happy now, because every time I'm sad, I could hear his soothing voice, and my heart will peaceful.....
I'm happy now, because every time I was upset, his laughter will remove all restless in my heart..
I'm happy now, because every time I miss him, he's always there waiting for me..
I'm happy now, because every time my heart overflowing with love, his sincere heart will gladly accept all..
And I'm happy now, because I finally found him..

But dear Allah,
At the same time I'm also sad,
Because I can not prove all this happiness through time ..
Whereas I need to prove it

Dear Allah, Please..
Give me a little more time..
Time to be able to reply every happiness that he has given to me ..
Time to be together with him..
A tiny little time
Just as long as he want me..
As long as he needs me
Dear Allah, I beg You.. Amin

Questioning..

Sometimes I just don't get it, why a man take his past love story to answer his present lover's question about her?

Maybe he just wanna show his entire reference so she will get a whole concept.

Maybe he just felt secure with his new love and feel like that was a common things to do?

I wondering why..

I didn't said that that was a forbidden things to do.. I accept whatever things that given to me, but sometimes I also accept an unwanted answer, unsaid & non verbal mostly, that u still have (too much) special feeling for her, something "undone" yet, and nothing compare to (or, not better than) her.

Yeah, I know she is special
She is your dream come true (with one wishing condition)
And u wont be with me if she is available :p

Hahaha
A jealousy inside
A crushing attack for her self confidence
And then be more careful about her feelings (if perhaps, might be, he is not crazy about her, just like she do)

We (or at least, I) don't want it, boys.
We will ask u about her (for sure) in a separate question.. :p
So, keep it on its portion :p
We always want to be a most special person for you..

Is this all just dream?

Story Board :

1. I am Wake up *blinking.. try to capture your presence in mind
   
2. "Dear God, One more day has pass.. Please give me strength today.. an extra strength.. amiiin"
3. Hubby.. my hubby.. *smiling
4. Checking my cellphone *humph.. nothing in there :(
5. Day dreaming for about 5-10 minutes, checking and keeping my yesterday memory and dreams.
6. Take a bath..
7. Praying
8. Get clothes & Make up
9. Listen for my duty for today from my mom, about my L.E day.. while I am eating.. "God, please trick her, so my face won't look so sad"
10. Check my music play list, wearing headset (choose "just the way you are by Bruno Marsh"), kiss my parents (usually they said something, but I can't hear it perfectly because of my music :p), and go to work.
11. brruuumm.. bruummm.. bruummm..
12. Finally arrive.. go to my room
13. Checking my cell phone *no sms from hubby :(
14. Apel
15. Checking my cell phone again.. *still nothing
16. Ok , me first.. *take the phone and sms hubby
17. Yeaaayyy.. hubby reply *happy happy
18. Thinking *May I reply it again? Ah.. I want to >.< **sending sms ***few times
19. Ok, it's time to work.. *play my music with headset, loudly
20. "Geezz this song.." when Cry from Rihana played *Stunning for a moment
21. Get bored, all done.. hm..
22. Check my cell phone *nothing :(
23. Can I sms him? can i? can i?
24. aaarrgghh i better wait
25. Huaaa hubby sms me.. :D
26. Dhuhur *praying for best
27. Ashar *praying for a miracle
28. Go home.. *quick quick quick
29. Waiting for my hubby, but sometimes i can't, i got something to do :'( *please hurry.. my hubby is waiting >.< *maghrib
    
30. My Hubby is comiinggg.. :) :) :) *happy happy happy, super happy! **he usually ask me to isya in between :p
    
31. Laugh.. laugh.. laugh.. :D
32. Love.. Love.. Love..
33. Permeates your being, your face, your expression, your smile
34. Watching u sleep.. Ah, miss u so hubby! Ugghh.. T.T
35. Dont Sleep away this night my baby, please stay with me until it dawn.. It hurts to know another hour has gone by.. The reason is still I love you. :(